“What do you need?”⁠⁣
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Rather than jumping in with comparisons, what other people in the same situation have done or sharing your own experience, just remember it is the other person who is suffering right now. ⁠⁣
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You might not know what to say or do, you might be scared of doing the wrong thing, you might want to do something but not know what would be helpful.⁠⁣
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My advice – just ask the other person what they need. They may say…⁠⁣
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🗨 I need a hug ⁠⁣
🗨 I just need to scream ⁠⁣
🗨 I need to have a good cry⁠⁣
🗨 I need to be on my own ⁠⁣
🗨 I need to just get out of the house⁠⁣
🗨 I need people to stop sending me thoughtless messages⁠⁣
🗨 I just want to have a normal day, doing something I used to enjoy doing⁠⁣
🗨 I think I need to talk to someone, I’m really struggling⁠⁣
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Then see if there is anything you may be able to do to help with that need, IF it feels right for you. ⁣
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🤔 Can you visit them? ⁣
🤔 Give them that hug? ⁣
🤔 Take them for a drive? ⁣
🤔 Sit with them while they cry/scream/release? ⁣
🤔 Drop off a food parcel if they want to be alone? ⁣
🤔 Post them a little gift? ⁣
🤔 Take them for a coffee or shopping or whatever they used to enjoy? ⁣
🤔 Listen if they want to talk?⁠⁣
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You aren’t there to fix anything. But you can be there to help with what the other person may need…but you won’t know what they actually need unless you ask them.⁠⁣